Ah, to be a child. My favorite thing to happen to me in a long time happened tonight while we were at a chinese buffet for dinner (auspicious beginning, I know). I was checking out the dessert bar, when all of a sudden a little boy runs up right next to me, stops, and yells "JELLO!" at the top of his lungs. He proceeds to run around the counter in joy and then stops, screams a very high pitch scream, and runs off to get his mother to help him get some.

As funny as it was, especially since it happened literally right next to me, I miss childhood and feeling scream-level excitement over something as simple as jello.

I'm loving...

1. Chex Mix.

It is so good. Why haven't I bought it more often in my snack buying years? Great, and now I'm getting hungry thinking about it. The only problem is that there aren't enough bagel chips in it. As a facebook friend suggested they should make a Chex Mix "Oops, All Bagel Chips" edition. If they did, I would buy that and a bag of regular Chex Mix and pour them both into a huge bowl. Stir. Eat. Be happy.

Does anyone else think about snack food as much as I do?

2. Gel manicures.

I got my first salon manicure EVER (shocking, I know) last week for my sister's wedding. She insisted I get a gel manicure because they last longer, and because if I got a regular one and my nail polish chipped, the wedding would be ruined.

I'm converted. It was definitely more expensive- $30 for a basic gel manicure, but I got a french so it was $36- but you get what you pay for, as usual. I didn't take a picture the day it was done, but rest assured they looked very pretty and shiny. Even though the Vietnamese gentleman who did them messed up and had to re-do one nail three times and there were still several small snags/smears but after three re-dos I began to doubt his ability to execute a clean gel manicure and just let it go. It looked fine from a foot and a half away.

You can see the snag on the top right if you look closely. Small, I know, but when I'm paying $40+ after the tip just for a manicure, I feel like perfection is not too much to ask.

The gel is starting to chip almost a week later, but it's held up way better than any regular nail polish would under the assault my hands and nails go through working in a restaurant. I've heard/seen from others who get gel manicures and don't work in restaurants that theirs don't start to chip 'til closer to two weeks.

the major chip that showed up at work a few days ago

my left hand still looks pretty good a week later

Next time, I'll probably just do a gel pedicure and skip the manicure until I work somewhere else or have a bit of time off. But believe me, I will be getting one again. I don't think I'd get them regularly, just because I'm not a bi-monthly mani/pedi kind of girl, but I think they're great for special occasions or when you just feel like you need a little extra pampering.

3. The Book of Mormon on Broadway

I've been SO excited about this since it was announced a couple years ago that the creators of South Park are working on a Mormon broadway musical. I've been eagerly devouring every article and video interview of the creators and of several others involved in the show that have come out in the last several months. That's about all I could do to satiate my excitement since a trip to NY to see the thing for myself isn't in the cards at the moment. Then amazon put the soundtrack on sale for only TWO DOLLARS last week, which I immediately purchased and am well on my way to memorizing, thanks to my ipod and a 30+ minute commute to work.

It is brilliant, and I don't say that lightly. They spent years writing this musical, and it shows. It just won freaking nine Tonys, including best musical!! Since hearing the brilliance and hilarity of the full soundtrack for myself, I've become obsessed with trying to figure out the plausibility of a trip to New York to see it. Here's the number they performed at the Tonys:

4. Maui

It lives up to all the hype, and then some. I would probably have never gone on my own, but I went last week thanks to the aforementioned sister's wedding, and I was blown away. It is SO beautiful and so fun. Hawaii always sounded so touristy and cliche to me, but once I was there, all I kept thinking was "I get it now." The weather is always perfect, there's a rainbow or two every day, the landscape and ocean are beautiful, and the amazing nature escapades are plentiful.

My favorite experience was when we went snorkeling at a bay just 20 minutes from our hotel and we saw a ton of gorgeous, vibrant fish swimming on the coral reef, and then even some giant sea turtles!! We saw three or four, and you can get super close to them! (touching is a no-no, but that didn't stop certain family members who shall remain nameless) I felt like I was in an episode of Planet Earth! My only regret is that we only stayed for five days. When I let myself dwell on it, I really do feel extremely stupid that we didn't plan to stay longer. They're not exaggerating when they call it paradise.

on our way back from snorkeling standing in front of a beautiful lush rainforest you walk through to get to the bay

Ben cliff jumping- against the advice of a friendly German doctor I was talking to down on the rocks where I sat to take this picture

On top of the world

colorful craters on the side of the Hale'akala volcano

cool silver cactus plants on top of Hale'akala

My mom on the top of Hale'akala overlooking the ocean. You can even see Mauna Loa and Mauna Kea on the big island in the distance!

Mission Accomplicated

Don't get me wrong, I'm really glad bin Laden was taken out, but amidst all the "Go USA!" and "Hooray for the troops" cheers I'm hearing right now, I can't help thinking about what caused 9/11 in the first place: the severe ideological differences between the USA and some Middle Eastern cultures. I am so grateful to the men and women who serve overseas (and my boyfriend will soon be one of them), and I love this country, but what I want to know is how those radicals became so enraged and hopeless that they felt their only option was to kill thousands of Americans as quickly as possible in an act of disgusting terrorism.

While I believe there is probably a fair amount of brainwashing involved, I think understanding and education are going to go a hell of a lot farther than bombs in combating extremism. America's foreign policy needs to be re-thought if we want to stop leaders like bin Laden from ever being created; specifically the way we pump money into the Middle East. Instead of fueling Afghanistan's war against the USSR or giving Israel $13 million a day in foreign aid, we might want to fuel more constructive efforts like Greg Mortenson's, as detailed in Three Cups of Tea.

This is a complicated issue, and I don't pretend to have all or any of the answers, but as far as I can tell, understanding and acceptance are the keys to peace, not invasions and manhunts. It's been said before, and it will be said again, but although we have finally succeeded in killing bin Laden, our invasions and efforts since 9/11 have inspired a hundred more bin Ladens. I can't overemphasize the scope of the discordance between the US and the Middle East. I'm afraid (and I hope I'm wrong) that the death of one man will have accomplished little in the name of peace.

anatomy of an alcoholic

My roommate/landlord is an alcoholic. He is a 38-year-old male. He has no steady employment, but according to him, makes more than ever "consulting." No word yet on what or who he consults. I never see him leave the house anymore, so I'm confused as to when he's doing this consulting. Anyway, that's not the point. It's started to adversely affect my living situation. It's nothing serious, he's not violent so far, but it makes me nervous and uncomfortable and unwilling to stay in any part of the house that he is occupying for more than 34 seconds.

Please enjoy the following 100% scientific and accurate charts I've prepared to document his typical day so you can better understand what I'm dealing with here.

figure 1: how his time is spent while awake

figure 2: most common activities while drunk

**This pie slice would be drastically larger if I stayed in the same room as him for longer than 34 seconds.

why I take a roll of toilet paper with me to the movie theater

I'm a movie-cryer. It's sort of a problem. I cry at movies that I'm pretty sure no one involved in the making of the movie intended for it to be a crying movie. I cried at Star Trek for pete's sake. I almost said "for crying out loud" instead of "for pete's sake" but that seemed too ironic and cutesy. Who the hell is pete though? I'm not happy with either of these expressions. Anyways, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, my unnecessary histrionics. I even cried at Iron Man 2.

Not really on that last one. I really hope you didn't believe that of me, I'd probably be mentally impaired if that was true. But I'm not kidding about the volume and range of movies I cry at. I cry at movies that I don't even care about, that I know are stupid. Hold on, my alcoholic roommates are raising my anger level to homicidal- I need to relocate.

There, that's better. For no reason other than boredom and a personal resolution to blog more often than once every other month, I've organized any crying movies I could think of into lists (not comprehensive) of light to moderate to severe based on how long/hysterically I cried while watching. Consider my self-respect left at the door.

light: Just tearing up or only a few silent tears running down my right cheek. The only kind of movie crying that I have any hope of concealing from the person sitting next to me in the theater who will think I'm deranged if I don't.

"Juno"

"Lord of the Rings"

"Star Wars"

"Finding Nemo"

"Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"

"Tuck Everlasting"

moderate: crying at a controlled volume for less than ten minutes

"A Walk to Remember"

"Dumbo"

"Titanic"

"Charlotte's Web"

"Stepmom"

"Armageddon"

"Pay It Forward"

"Pan's Labyrinth"

severe: Crying for ten minutes or more, sometimes up to an half hour after the movie has ended at a level of hystericity (not a word) appropriate for someone who has just witnessed their entire family being murdered by Voldemort. This is not a pretty cry, people.

"Big Fish"

"The Time Traveler's Wife"

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"

"Moulin Rouge"

"Ghost"

"The Lion King"

"A.I."

in its own category: this movie exceeded all other previous and subsequent crying levels because I cried FOUR SEPARATE times and continued to sit in the theater for five minutes during the credits and sob while hugging my parents

Are you ready?

....

"Up"

That's right, a goddamn Pixar movie. Why those sadistic Disney bastards love killing off immediate family members in almost every feature film is a topic for another blog post, but I will never watch that movie again.

Honorary literary mention: The sixth Harry Potter book (not the movie) when SPOILER ALERT Dumbledore dies. I cried for about two hours and even had to call my mom who was out of town at 1 a.m. to help me calm down. The best part of this story is that I initially refused to tell her why I was calling her crying at 1 a.m. because she hadn't read the Harry Potter books yet and I didn't want to ruin it for her.

As an afterthought I added a fourth list: popular movies I refuse to watch because I know I will end up hysterical

"Precious"

"The Green Mile"

"Schindler's List"

"The Pursuit of Happyness"

"Million Dollar Baby"

"Sophie's Choice"

"Saving Private Ryan"

I have two questions about these lists.

1. Should I be worried about what this says about me psychologically and emotionally?

2. Why are so many of these children's movies?!

read this if you remotely care for electro pop

You know that feeling when something is so amazing and brings you so much joy that you just want to climb to the top of the nearest mountain and shout to the world that you've found love?That's how I feel about these songs. Unlike the latest Britney Spears product placement-laden video, I just cannot get tired of these songs; they're a revelation.

I saved the best for first: "Byrds of Prey" by Bertie Blackman. Fabulously fantastic. I haven't been so obsessed with a song since I first heard La Roux. Must be listened to with good headphones at least once.

"Audacity of Huge" by Simian Mobile Disco featuring Chris Keating. It wasn't love at first listen. In fact, at first I thought it was Eurotrash techno. But after a couple times, I started really hearing the words and was struck with the sheer coolness of this song.

Passion Pit- "Little Secrets." I'm speechless. MTV2 describes it as "Indie Disco," and I don't think I could do any better than that. I might venture to compare them to an amped-up MGMT.

"Allein Allein"- Polarkreis 18. Yes, it's a German band, and the title translates to "Alone Alone." The message is rather depressing if you stop to think about it, but I don't because I can't get over how hauntingly lovely this song is.

Hot Chip- "Take It In." I strongly recommend listening to this one on the ol' headphones too. A much more pensive, piercing Hot Chip than you may have already heard in "Ready for the Floor" or "Over and Over."

World peace might be closer than we think

Have you heard of the show Little Mosque on the Prairie? It's a Canadian sitcom with Muslims comprising several of the main characters.

I thought it might be interesting so I started watching it tonight. It's not. I'm pleased to report it's just as mediocre and ho-hum as Two and a Half Men and The King of Queens (insert Charlie Sheen joke here?). Just like when I try to watch those shows, I felt the urge to stick needles in my eyes, because at least that would be more lively.

Why does this make me so happy? Truly, having their own worthless sitcom has to be a sign of Western culture's acceptance of Muslims. The fact that the show is so unremarkable gives me great hope for our society. If Western attitude toward Muslims and Middle Easterners was really that poor, this show either would not get made at all, or it would have to be much, much better in terms of writing, acting, and originality in order to make a bold social commentary to initiate a change in popular attitude.* Especially since these lowest common denominator shows, to quote Ricky Gervais, pander to the exact demographic that I would most expect to be racist against Arabs, Muslims, or anyone with brown skin not part of the black category. Can peaceful relations between the West and the Middle East really be that far away? (Yes, yes they can. Thank you, George W. Bush)

By now I've said at least eight offensive things against people from all walks of life. I thought about editing myself for a second, but then I remembered that this is my opinion blog, and neither of us come here because I am a paragon of diplomacy.

*At this point I am realizing I underestimated how difficult it would be to write coherent sentences at 4 a.m., even though I've been working nights this week and haven't been able to fall asleep much before 5 a.m. for the past three nights anyway. I just needed to get that out.